Save The Dates: Revisited

Remember when I shared my save the date indecision? I was torn between the magnet and the postcard. I pained over the decision, worrying that postcards might get lost in the shuffle. Y'all gave me some great feedback and eased my fears. When my engagement session photo disk came in, I went straight to work, creating four different postcard design options and threw in one magnet design for good measure. Mr. Hawk and I reviewed them, and I thought we had it settled... I was wrong.

The next morning I told Mr. Hawk that I was planning on submitting my order that day in case he had any last minute input. (Of course he did. Why did I open my mouth?) He was suddenly concerned about the postcards. Would they get lost? Would people chuck them? He thought magnets were definitely the way to go. I was flabbergasted. I had brought up these concerns not only on the blog, but verbally. To him. Personally. More than once. (Does anyone else feel like sometimes they must be talking to a wall?) I had bookmarked several options that I liked before, but decided to do a last minute etsy search. I came across a couple designs that really caught my eye by Sunshine Greeting Card Co.

Images via scgg

I loved the simplicity of the designs and they were different that many other STDs I had seen. SCGG offers options of both postcards and magnets. (We were obviously going the magnet route.) The magnet option was more affordable than what I had seen in my previous searches. And I was very excited since it really involved minimum effort on my part. Email wording and photo. Done. I was so proud of myself for not going into panic-mode.

Anyone else suffer from the SO half-listen? Has it caused any snags in your planning?

When Relationships Change

I know this topic has been discussed many times at the 'bee, (most recently by Miss Fox), but for some reason it still has a stigma attached to it, so I figured I'd throw in my experience...

In the months leading up to my engagement, I began spending a lot of time with a very good friend of mine. We had been close for years and even lived together previously, but we became inseparable. From after work happy hours to Saturday afternoon shopping trips, we spent nearly all our free time together. So when Mr. Hawk and I announced our engagement, there wasn't a doubt in my mind who I wanted to be my MOH. We were thrilled, and she began excitedly planning the bachelorette party and other fun activities; however, it wasn't long afterward that things greatly changed in her life.

She broke up with her serious boyfriend and moved out of the house they shared together. She moved in with Mr. Hawk and I for several weeks until she could find a new home, and she was surprisingly upbeat and optimistic. But once she moved into her new apartment things shifted. We had a pretty large difference of  opinion on something, and it created a large wedge between us. During this time, I think we both felt abandoned, and we rarely spoke to one another. Our lack of relationship during that time was not at all wedding related, but was even more glaringly obvious because of all the planning I was doing without her.

We attempted to patch things up several times, but for some reason it was still awkward and uncomfortable between us. Finally I got up the courage to bring up wedding talk. I asked her if she thought being MOH was putting too much pressure on us to just hurry up and be normal again. She said yes and admitted that additionally with her own relationship ending recently, she was still a bit heartbroken and finding it hard to be excited about a wedding, something she had once dreamed of having with her ex. Everything was out in the open, and I felt a huge weight lifted off me. We both decided it wouldn't be the Hawk wedding without her in it, but she could take the less stressful position of BM instead. I'm not going to lie and say that our heart to heart was a "magic fix," but it definitely helped. We talk more often, spend time together again, and are even able to bring up the "w" word.

The point of my bringing this story up was not to throw my BM (or myself!) under the bus. It was just to let y'all know that it happens. When my relationship broke down, I felt like a failure and so alone in this situation. You are not alone! Relationships change. If the woman you imagined being your MOH would feel more comfortable stepping down to be a BM, it's okay. Or if she decides she'd rather support you from the pews, that's okay too. Planning a wedding is a long process and things are bound to change, most of which will be out of your control. It can be a heartbreaking experience, but I promise you'll make it through. (And if you need someone to talk to, I can completely relate!)

Have you experienced any relationship difficulties with family or friends during the wedding planning process?

No Cake For You.

I am not a cake person. For some reason it's just never been my thing. Even as a child I would pass on the birthday cake. Now show me some warm chocolate chip or peanut butter cookies, and we have a different story; however, in the past year or so I discovered something very curious: my distaste for cake comes to a screeching halt when cake becomes CUPcakes. I think has a lot to do with the fact that cupcakes come in so many flavors: key lime, apple pie, salted caramel, carrot cake, red velvet, s'mores, banana split, peach cobbler... (I could fill a whole post, but for y'alls' sakes, I'll keep myself in check.)

Trying new flavors and cupcake shops has almost become a sport for Mr. Hawk and I. If we find a new shop in town, we pick out a half dozen to take home and feast on them rest of the week. (Correction: mine last a week. Mr. Hawk eats all of his within two days and then pouts until I share my half with him.) We even have our favorites cupcakes and shops ranked. (Moistness of cake, cake to icing ratio, and cupcake size are all considered.) It.Is.Serious.

Pearl's Deep Dish Apple Pie my absolute favorite! Via Foodspotting

So naturally since cupcakes are somewhat of a large presence in our lives, they must be a part of the wedding dessert menu. It makes me a little sad to be missing out on some gorgeous wedding cakes, but it just wouldn't be the Hawk wedding without cupcakes.

That being said, I've begun to think a lot about the cake-cutting. I honestly don't think I would be devastated to miss it, but it is a really sweet moment between bride and groom. I suppose we could feed each other cupcake, but then we wouldn't have a reason to buy an awesome Kate Spade cake cutter! But in all seriousness, I've been wondering if we should compromise and get a small cake for the top tier of our cupcake stand.

Image via Top Wedding Cakes

Hive, help me out. Did you/are you considering serving cupcakes as your main wedding dessert? If so, did you forgo cake all together?

(Totally off subject but does anyone else immediately think of the Bachelor/Bachelorette and their inability to pronounce  the word "forgo" on the overnight dates?!!)

Shouldn't All Family Members Be Allowed to Attend?

I am probably not going in the direction that you think... I am talking about by fur-babies: Bella, Jetta, and Tug. Some of you may think that I have a screw or two loose, but in my eyes the Hawk pups are a legitimate part of our family. In fact, they are our family. When we first moved in together, the joining together of my Bella and Tug with Mr. Hawk's Jetta under one household was the first real step in creating our own little family unit. In my head I'm picturing the Brady Bunch intro with dogs... (I probably lost a few of y'all with that statement, right? Yes, I'm the crazy dog lady.)

Tug

Bella and Jetta

(Personal photos)

They are my protectors (from the big bad mailman), my cuddle buddies when its couch time, and my all-around companions. They are such a huge part of me and shape my daily life. So it's only right that they be part of the day where the Hawks officially and legally become family, right?

Can't you just imagine our little flower girl walking "B" and "Jetta-pants" down the aisle? It would be such a sweet moment.

Image Via The Knot, Photo by Missy Photography

And I love the idea of a floral collar.

Image via The Knot, Photo by Laura Ivanova

And how freaking handsome would "Tuggles McGuggles" look in a bow-tie, carrying our rings? My heart melts...

Image via Etsy shop Big Paw Collars

Having them participate in our wedding would be priceless! Alas, reality has set in, and I'm having to accept that my furry family will not be able to be present on our day. Wren has very strict guidelines: NO.DOGGIES.ALLOWED. (Just because it's a 300-plus year old building and historical monument? Psh. Who do they think they are...)

And if I think about it with even more scrutiny, I know that Bella would probably squat halfway down the aisle, Jetta would be knocking peoples hands to be pet, and Tug would surely jump up on half our guests to greet them with kisses. But in my head I can't help but dream...

Are you incorporating your fur-babies into your big day? (Or do you think I'm completely looney tunes?)

Swooping in: Miss Hawk!

HI Y'ALL!

I am so completely overcome with excitement, shock, and maybe even a dash of disbelief mixed in to be writing my first official post as a bee! I feel incredibly blessed and honored to be able to share my wedding journey with y'all. Being one of the first couples in our group of friends to tie the knot, being cross-country from my family, and attending only one wedding in my adult life, I was so L.O.S.T. when it came to wedding planning. But when I found Weddingbee, I truly felt like a found a group of supportive, wedding-crazed friends to help me along my way. I hope that I can provide the same support and inspiration that y'all have provided me!

So onto a little bit about the Hawks:

Personal Photo

I am an ultimate girly girl and an animal lover. I'm the dog-mommy to three adorable dogs: Bella, Tug, and Jetta. (Yes, we have three dogs, and no, I am no longer allowed to be a foster mom.) I am also an avid reader and undercover nerd. I have had the privilege of living in four different states while growing up, but I now call Virginia home.

Mr. Hawk is a sports fanatic and native Virginian. He's an extremely hard-worker and dedicated to his job, which often takes him on the road. In his spare time, you will most likely find him snuggled on the couch with his Jetta-dog either watching whatever sport happens to be in season at the time, reading ESPN.com, or playing Madden on his Xbox.

So why Miss Hawk? I'm worried that I'm going to disappoint. I don't know if I have a really good reason. When Pengy formally announced the woodland generation, I was immediately drawn to her. She just looked so feminine to me. (Mr. Hawk says it because she's wearing lipstick. So maybe that's it.) But I also think it may be because she looks fierce and focused. When I set my sights on something, I can be that way too. And she has brown feathers like the color of my hair. Is that enough reasons? I hope so, 'cause that's all I've got.

xxoo,
Miss Hawk

Registries Are Exhausting

This weekend we finally ticked off another major task on the to-do list: our registry. I'll be honest with y'all. Registering was on the bottom of my priority list. I knew it was something that had to be taken care of at some point and time, but I was kind of dreading it. In a lot of ways I was thinking it was going to be a pointless exercise. I mean, Mr. Hawk and I have been living together for over a year now. What could we really need? When we decided to rent a home together, we both brought a good amount of things into our home: pots and pans, plates, silverware... Or so I thought. Being little miss Type-A, I printed several suggestion lists: Real Simple, Macy's, and Crate & Barrel and reviewed them thoroughly. When it came time to take a good solid inventory, I realized that we were definitely lacking. I'm embarrassed to admit that in a lot of ways we've been living like college kids (at 26 and 30, no less)!

The majority of our cups (I can't even call it glassware) are emblazoned with either Green Leafe logos (one of my favorite college bars) or sports logos. We have a collection of mismatched wine glasses we've collected at our various wine tasting outings, and our serving platters are all Tar-gay plastics. I was incredibly surprised that I only was able to eliminate a handful of items from the registry lists! Apparently this registry thing was something we needed more than I originally thought.

With my notated lists in hand, we went to Macy's. We decided to take care of a lot of big-ticket items there such as our china, silverware, and small appliances. At first I regretted bringing Mr. H when it came to China patterns. He thought China was pointless, yet was somehow very opinionated when it came to decision-making. (Sigh.) In the end we were able to agree on a great pattern.

Lenox's Venetian Lace

Then after a Starbucks visit later (and Venti-sized coffees in hand, did I mention the exhaustion?), we were on to Crate & Barrel. C&B was the place I was most looking forward to after our in-home inventory. I knew that we were in desperate need of every day items. We found some great glassware (plastic cups, be gone!) and grown-up serving platters. One of my favorite items we found was the lightly green-tinted Miguel pitcher and glasses.

Image via Crate & Barrel

Mr. Hawk took charge of the scanner gun (of course) and I actually think that he might have had a good time (besides the whole "I'm missing college football for this" attitude.)

Mr. H trying to register for the Woodford Reserve Bourbon (Personal Photo)

We pretty much selected everything we needed to besides a couple items that I wanted to do a bit more research on before choosing a brand and model. The online feature is going to be a life-saver, especially for price comparisons. I know there's not a chance in hell I'll get Mr. H back out there, scanner gun or not.

How was your registry experience? We're you surprised by the amount of items you ended up needing?

We Go Together Like Meat and Potatoes

I've already mentioned some ways Mr. Hawk and I are different. (Like I'm a crier and he's pretty unemotional. I can be a gut-feel gal, and he likes the hard cold facts.) But the reality is that those differences are just the tip of the iceberg with us. I'd even venture to say that we are more different then we're alike in a lot of ways.

Mr. H and I grew up very differently. We come from different ethnic backgrounds, different socioeconomic backgrounds, and different lifestyles. Mr. Hawk was one of four children and spent most of his adolescence living out in the country. (The sticks!) I was pretty darn spoiled being an only child most of my life. Growing up I moved around quite a bit. From Arizona to Virginia to Texas to Tennessee back to Virginia, I never really had a "hometown."

In fact, our differences were so blatantly obvious that when Mr. H and I first started officially dating, I received a lot faux-pleasant "oh really?"'s. (The southern equivalent of "no effin' way!") I heard whispers (not always so quietly) from friends. None of the talk had anything to do with friends disliking one of us, I think we just really took everyone by surprise. They didn't picture us together.

What they failed to realize at the time was that our differences is what make us work.  If Mr. H and I grew up in the same city, had similar families, and had every interest in common we would be SO.DARN.BORING. Our differences allow us to have interesting conversations where a lot of times we arrive at the same conclusion but have completely opposing reasons as to how we got there. We get to be exposed to new experiences (like Mr. H's first camping trip)! And best of all we get to explore and cultivate new interests together as a couple (like our obsession with local baseball and our new found love of wine tasting).

       

I wouldn't want to lie to you and say that it is all sunshine and rainbows. There are some days when I exasperatedly wonder, "why doesn't he get where I'm coming from?" But we're learning from each other, and I really believe that we're growing into better people because of one another.  I can't imagine us any other way. (And in case you were wondering, our friends now definitely agree.)

Did you and your significant other have a lot in common right from the start?

All photos personal

An Engaging Photo Session

A couple weeks ago on a Sunday afternoon, Mr. Hawk and I met up with Valerie of Valerie Demo Photography in Downtown Richmond for our engagement session. When trying to decide where to take our photographs, I had a little difficulty. After my relentless stalking Valerie's blog (along with other inspiration like SMP, Bride's Cafe, Weddingbee...) My brain was clouded with so many beautiful ideas.

I adored the look of on the beach photos with dreamy light:

Photo via Valerie Demo

But the beach isn't really Mr. D and I's thing. (We're kinda more pool people!)

I also loved the rustic countryside photos:

Photo via Gabe Aceves

But again, it didn't really feel like us. (I mean we live within the city limits, for goodness sake.)

Since we're getting married in Williamsburg instead of Richmond, we really wanted a way to feature our hometown, the city where we met and fell in love. There are plenty of beautiful parks and scenic areas great for photo ops, but we chose to go downtown for our e-session. (More specifically Shockoe Bottom and the Canal Walk.) I couldn't be happier with the way the photos turned out. Here are some of my favorites:

Did you take engagement photos? How did you decide where to take them?

Photos personal unless otherwise noted.

Love Affair... With My Hair??

This may sound a little silly, but I L.O.V.E. my hair. (And the versatility of it!) From a very young age, my mom meticulously styled my hair with a new look daily: braids, ribbons, bows, curls, and ponytails. In my world, every day was a new adventure in hair. Apparently wanting to change up my look with different hair styles stuck with me all these years. Changing my hair to combat boredom has been my crux:

College years: Long with highlights: "Look ma, no hands!"

All-over color dyed dark brown

Major chop and MAJOR highlights

Back to dark last winter

Because my hair stylist happens to be a good friend of mine and knows my penchant for hairstyle ADD, one of the first things she asked me after getting engaged was what color and what length my hair would be for the wedding. She wanted me to plan ahead so we would be ready. I decided to go long and stick with natural-looking highlights. (This is the way I feel most "me," and the style I consistently come back to after major changes.) The only problem? No changing up my hair. The thought of it makes me mentally squirm. No more fun spur of the moment cuts or dye jobs just for kicks. My hair is all business 'til May. I have a feeling I'm going to be running to the salon for a major change-up once the wedding is over.

This face is for you, Chels. You're killing me! Currently long and highlighted

How did you plan in advance for your wedding hair look? Does anyone else out there suffer from hair ADD like me?

All photos personal